This week is about Surrender. In many ways I have no right to write about surrender and in many ways I have completely earned the right to write about it. I have this little rule: "You cannot teach what you have not experienced." I am not sure I am your teacher here, but nonetheless the rule still applies. Surrender has been a very tough subject for me to live. Being a recovering control freak, I am the epitome of non-surrender. For me learning to surrender hinges on trust and allowing my circumstances to be dictated by God. When we are young we are in the back seat while God is driving. Eventually we get to be in the front seat not to drive, but to get a front seat view as a passenger. One might think being a passenger is too passive, but living in a state of surrender is about knowing you’re better off letting your higher power drive.
My teacher used to always say to me if you get out of the way, "God will create circumstances that you could not have dreamed of." When we get in the way, we can alter and screw up the very blessings that were meant to come our way. Forcing, rushing, and manipulating God’s plans for us because we believe our two cents are needed, or to insure we get our way.
In savasana we lay on our back, practicing surrender and letting the tension be released from our body. I have heard more than one instructor say savasana is the hardest posture to do. To let our body take in and deal with the efforts from class while our only task is to breathe and observe. It's the observation part that is tough as times.
I don't know about you, but sometimes when I stand back and observe I am not sure I trust the moment. I want to get in there and make sure everyone involved has interpreted the moment properly so the outcome is "good" or the way I see it. Even if I am not interested in the outcome being "good for me" I still want to make sure it is good. I just hate seeing injustice and this is where I go very wrong indeed. Sometimes injustice is just a stepping-stone to justice and I need to mind my own business.
On a lighter note, what I love watching is the orchestration of God when I follow the clues and surrender. Last summer, when we remodeled the Stockton studio, I had no I idea how it was going to be accomplished. I wanted to recreate the studio but did not know, in a million years, how I would do it. (And then there is the mistake in the sentence "I did not know how ‘I’ would do it".) Then I received a Facebook message that would change everything. God put in motion a set of events between Tara Heinzen and myself that would create a domino effect, allowing the remodel to happen. The entire time that the remodel was taking place, God kept supporting the mission in the most unbelievable ways—putting things in Tara's lap and in mine that made the impossible possible. There is NO WAY I could have done that remodel myself. OH NO, I give 100% of the credit to surrender and trust. That remodel gave True You a new look and an extended meaning but it also gave to those who where a part of it. Lessons were learned, friendships were formed, and a boutique was created that would effect many in a positive way. I will always count the remodel as a complete act of God. I had to let go and let God in order for it to happen, which I am typically no good at. To this day, if my ego gets involved in a divinely inspired event I run into trouble, but when I give all the glory to surrender and divine orchestration, the end result grows into the fullness it was intended for.
So as you move forward today and everyday, look for the clues to surrender. Are you fearful, fighting, and judging or are you trusting and having faith in the moment? Can you consciously relax and let go or are you fidgeting in your observation, afraid that things are not just as they are suppose to be?
Try to be strong enough to engage with each moment while being soft enough to flow with it.